This morning was brutal with Jordan at church. She is so depressed that she even said she doesnt want to live.
I didnt hang around for Laura. We got in a huge fight yesterday, and I havent really talked to her since. She hurts my heart so much. We had a miscommunication on the kids for Saturday. Laura got mad..really mad, when she found out that I had scheduled to go to Bill Johnson’s thing. So, I bagged Saturday and went over and hung with the kids.
She was still angry. There is no forgiveness in her heart for me. It is so hard. I sent her a pointed email last night.
Today, it was no better. So, I took Jordan for a ride, and things got better with her. We agreed to try focusing on the positives of life and not the negatives. We also agreed to try to let the little things go. I pray our Father will give her the grace to do this. In the name of Jesus.
I got attacked big time yesterday. Some today. I have thoughts of divorce and hatred towards Laura. She breaks my heart.
We saw Evan Almighty today. It’s too funny. Everyone persecuted him for hearing God and doing what God told him to. His wife even sounded just like Laura all this time. It made me cry.
I yearn for time with my kids. I pray that their hearts are protected and they come to know the great love that I have for them.
Deliver me O LORD. YOU are MY Salvation!